Beauty Contest

Beauty Contest

I just turned 32. In these 32 years I have been through enough to drive someone insane. I’m not going there now. But I will go to someone else’s insanity- beauty contest.

As long as I can remember I have heard everything from “You’re so skinny, what are those, a size 2?” to “Why don’t you eat a chip!” Yeah, ultimately it is funny. But the reality is that these comments are just another mask of discrimination. If God had created me different and I was told things like “You’re eating again?” or “Those jeans are way to tight for you!” the majority of people would stand up for me as they would find these comments derogatory and offensive. So what then has our society done to twist our thinking into accepting one scenario over the other? Beauty Contest-Competition. It all comes back to a human need to have a sense of identity with someone or something. Identity brings acceptance and everyone wants to feel like they belong. The problem is if we are not careful in selecting our proper wardrobe, we will miss our purpose. Not to mention, destroy lives along the way.

I am no stranger to this crisis. I spent several years in the dance world. Dance is a beautiful art form but there is an undisputed competition that I believe is a discouraging force for not only the creative person but for people in general. I deliberately passed up opportunities to avoid the scenario of contest competition. Of course dance, for me, was more of a necessary expression of self or another creative outlet. And in my time as a teacher I reminded my students of their unique gifts and abilities. It’s heartbreaking to see a 10- year-old girl feel defeated because she is setting someone else as her standard of excellence; someone thinner, someone older, someone with more experience or medals.

I had the unpleasant experience of hearing mothers disparage their children in my presence or compare them to the others in the class; leaving them embarrassed beyond rescue. What could I do except remind them and my students of their inner-beauty that is just waiting to pour out of their movement.

Still, whether in a class full of 3-4 yr olds, young girls, and teenagers or a room full of grown women, the competitive spirit hovers waiting for someone to destroy.

We must understand that however misguided our society has become we were not designed to compete with one another.

We were designed with a God-designed purpose. Regardless of where you are, what you’ve done or been through, you have a unique purpose. And while people are a central part of our existence as human beings it is not for the purpose of hurting one another.

I always have marched to the beat of my own drum, but even rebellion has its consequences. Partly upbringing and partly and perhaps consequently having misanthrope tendencies, I often found myself sinking further away from this competitive mentality, in spite of my yearning to make sense of it all and break the yoke of social ignorance. I, then, was in no position to even attempt, however desperately I wanted to, to fix mankind- or in this case woman; specifically, myself, a girl however imperfectly becoming a woman. Even now, while I acknowledge I am not the fixer of anyone, not even myself, I do hope to put a dent in this social ignorance.

Needless to say, I have never bought into competing with other women, ethnic groups or elitist groups. I have had and continue to recover from many complexes but beauty contest is not one of them. Being as such I have had the opportunity to observe its manipulative ways on people.

Let’s define.

Competition:

1. The act of competing; rivalry for supremacy, a prize, etc

2. A contest for some prize, honor, or advantage

So then, competition involves two or more parties for the purpose of winning something. Not necessarily physical but certainly placing importance or rather greater importance on those who win. I can think of several scenarios. Can you?

There is a time for competition. In fact our lives are a competition but not against one another. Instead we are at war with the evils of this world and ultimately the evil desires of our hearts. I daresay that beauty contest is one of those evils, however pretty she disguises herself. Don’t be fooled.

Why do women feel the need to constantly compare themselves to other women? Why do men compare themselves? Why are people drawn to doing everything they can to look or be better?

There are many answers to those questions. We are all different. We all have struggles and roots to those struggles. In other words, behind every beauty contest is a root of envy and jealousy, idolatry, ungratefulness and really selfishness. There is something missing in a person’s life who does not feel content with who she is. Thus, she strives to be a part of the beauty contest.

My husband loves sports- I can’t explain the degree. I really can’t. But it’s well known fact that sports involve competition: a rule of the game, a winner and a loser. I think about our hometown basketball team, The Spurs. Everybody loves The Spurs, I mean everybody! Specifically when they are winning championships. I remember in 2005 watching the finals and listening to all the horns honking after the game for hours and hours. There was this contagious pride going around. Suddenly, they were it because they were the winner. They instantly gained all this popularity because they won the competition. Certainly, they won championships before but the point being that competition involves a measure of success, a winner and loser and in some cases a complex.

I will reiterate, there is a war, a fight: a competition. But it is not with each other. It is between the Truth and lies of this world. Life is a race and there is a prize but it is available for all of us who seek diligently. The Bible tells us over and over again that we are in a battle to do what is right according to God’s Word. The enemy is not your sister, your mom, or a girl in your class, your girlfriends or them- whoever they are. The enemy is the accuser and he’s just waiting to devour you should you let him.

I have to state that in no way do I think that the world will change into this peaceful, accepting, equal place. But I offer you (reading this now) a challenge: Ask yourself.

Why do you find yourself comparing, competing? What is missing from your life that you feel this need to covet or envy what another has?

I don’t have the answer. But He does. Ask Him, He is faithful to answer you.

In His Image,

Lin