Sudden Shocking Change in My Comfortable Daily Life

It's March 31, 2016

By the Grace of the God of All I sit in my home in front of my computer holding my infant daughter as I write this post.

7 days ago I walked the Texas Children's hospital in Houston Texas hoping and praying that after nearly a month of hospitalization, my daughter would be released. It is strange to look back on this month and realize most of it was spent living in a hospital with my family.

How can I even begin to begin to explain how this journey began. I cannot. I am still processing all of this. It is too soon and personal to recount...now.

I can say that since I have had a chance to breathe and ask 'what on earth just happened?!', the response I got was not exactly one that satisfied my personal thirst for understanding and closure.

But, I know the reason why.

My life is not my own. My trials and tribulations are not my own. My emotional rollercoaster is not my own.

I can honestly say that in the countless dark hours I spent holding my breath while my daughter was hospitalized, I thought nothing about the hour we are in or the countless souls that are without Christ or the reality that even then I have been called to be a messenger and watchman. No, nothing mattered except my daughter getting better and our family going back home.

Little did I know that my small and seemingly humble wish was not God's immediate answered prayer. Little did I know that in all my repenting and giving my heart to him, there was still more I had to give, there was still more refining He needed to do- in me, in my children, in our family.

Words cannot describe seeing your child suffer. Words cannot describe seeing your child suffer.

It did not occur to me until much later...the same pain I have gone through is what the LORD goes through as He sees us in this world: His children whom He loves as they go through trials; His wayward sheep who go back to their old life; the lost souls who reject His gift of righteousness and love...yes all of us He weeps for.

He has made a simple way for all of us to be with Him, now and forever. But as He reminds us in His Word:
       

"All we like sheep have gone astray; we have turned—every one—to his own way; and the LORD has laid on him the iniquity of us all." - Isaiah 53:6

I 've been reminded in my trial and tribulation of the coming tribulation and inevitably the Great Tribulation that is sooner than any of us think.

The Lord in His gracious mercy has given me messages of warnings to share as He prompts me to write down by The Holy Spirit. And should I not see that when I have gone through what I have recently that He is also gracious and merciful to allow me to experience a small measure of the sufferings that will come to those who will reject Him at the final call?!

I didn't think so at first. I was hurt and angry. But all things work together for good for all who love Him.

I experienced a sudden shocking change in my comfortable daily life. My entire world was turned upside down. My youngest child in a very real sense was taken out of my care and at the hands of complete strangers with her life at risk. My other children (and husband)in another state unaware as I flew airlife to destination unknown. Yes, life as I knew it was changed in an instant and I could do nothing about it as I stood beside myself in shock and disbelief with wavering faith. Me, a daughter of the The Most High, curled up on the floor is disbelief at my present circumstances. How could this have happened?! Why did this happen?! Where was my Savior?! Why didn't He stop this from happening? And when was this going to end?

Truthfully, perhaps all of us have had these moments in life. Maybe not, I don't know. But what I do know by the Spirit of God is that a time is virtually here when many will experience a shaking that will suddenly change their lives and challenge their faith. Hopefully, bringing souls to repentance and surrender to Christ.

As I have shared before, and only by the grace of God waking me up Himself and telling me, time as we know it is about to end and The Great Tribulation will begin.
Just before the Great Tribulation is another tribulation that I know to be the time of sorrows: a time when life will suddenly, in an instant change and we will be beside ourselves. It is hard to imagine that anything could be worse than this time but the Bible is very clear that The Great Tribulation will be the worst time on earth. And I wish none to have to be here for that. But the reality is that many will be.


The Lord has commanded me to warn His people of the time of sorrows that is a moment away.


Do you know where you stand before God? Do you have any areas that you need to surrender to Him?

Now is the time to know! Now is the time to cry out! Do not put this off! Don not put this off!


Now is the time of salvation! Now is the time of salvation!

I've been led to share an excerpt of something I wrote one night while in the hospital. This is list of what I still held on to prior to this moment in time that has forever changed me and my family:
I've learned that I am so weak and needy but that the Lord is my strength. For He carried me through when no one else could or would.

I've been cured of my germophobia.

I've been cured of my fear of physicians.

I've been humbled and convicted of my haughty tendencies and I have no desire to remain in them.

I've been broken of my false securities in relation to my family.

I've been broken of my erroneous belief that I am my children's only source and savior.

I've been convicted of how little I have believed the best of myself and have seen just how poorly I have cared for myself mentally, emotionally and physically. Mostly for believing the lies of my lack of worth. In that conviction I realize that taking care of myself must happen to better care for my family. I have done it the opposite way up to this point.

I have been convicted of conditional love and affection and favoritism.

I am not in control of the world around me. I can only control my responses and my heart's condition.

“Behold, I am coming soon, bringing my recompense with me, to repay each one for what he has done."

-Revelation 22:12